Gold Digger

One thing I've begun to notice lately bothers me: men like to think women just want their money.

Men who insist women are "gold diggers" want to feel in control. They want to believe we're not after some fairy tale romance. They want to think we're fake—that cash comes first. Because that justifies their own failure. Yeah, they cheated, but we wanted money. Yeah, we got child custody, but we only wanted their money. If it wasn't about money we should have known who they truly are and been complacent.

"If I was richer I'd still be with her," Cee Lo Green whines. Men want to think we run off at the first show of power/money. So why do we shell out money for gas and rent to be with their broke asses? Why do we "slum it" when we could hypothetically sell out for the "man?"

I'd quickly loose respect for any man who insisted I only wanted their chump change. The wise woman insists that any money exchanged between partners will "almost even out." Psychologically, it might not—not if the whole structure of a relationships becomes about the money and not the passion.

Fretting that someone wants your money is denying that you are still madly in love with that person and unconditionally. It's denying that you shell out money in the hopes of being happy. Feeling owed dues amounts to treason in love.

No one wants to be a "comfort girl." Not when her deepest desire is true love.

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Bubble Mechanic is about women breaking out of prison. Glamorous, real, and without shame. Filling the hole society has left us with magic and love. http://bubblemechanic.blogspot.com

preach

For women, getting angry is socially unacceptable, even when the anger is over violence, discrimination, misogyny, and other forms of oppression. Anger is unacceptable because angry women are women in touch with their passion and power, especially in relation to men, which threatens the entire patriarchal order. It’s unacceptable because it forces men to confront the reality of male privilege and women’s oppression and their involvement in it, even if only as passive beneficiaries. Women’s anger challenges men to acknowledge attempts to trivialize oppression with “I was only kidding.” And women’s anger is unacceptable to men who look to women to take care of them, to prop up their need to feel in control, and to support them in their competition with other men. When women are less than gracious and good-humored about their own oppression, men often feel uncomfortable, embarrassed, at a loss, and therefore vulnerable.

Allan G. Johnson

Clap your hands

"I want to live in a world where little girls are not pinkified, but where little girls who like pink are not punished for it, either. We can certainly talk about the social pressures surrounding gender roles, and the concerns that people have when they see girls and young women who appear to be forced into performances of femininity by the society around them, but let’s stop acting like they have no agency and free will. Let’s stop acting like women who choose to be feminine are somehow colluders, betraying the movement, bamboozled into thinking that they want to be feminine. Let’s stop denying women their own autonomy by telling them that their expressions of femininity are bad and wrong.

Antifemininity is misogynist. What you are saying when you engage in this type of rhetoric is that you think things traditionally associated with women are wrong. Which is misogynist. By telling feminine women that they don’t belong in the feminist movement, you are reinforcing the idea that to be feminine and a woman is wrong, that women who want to be taken seriously need to be more masculine, because most people view gender presentation in binary ways. This rewards the ‘one of the boys’ type rhetoric I encounter all over the place from self-avowed feminists who seem to think that bashing on women is a good way to prove how serious they are when it comes to caring about women and bringing men into the feminist movement."

—	S. E. Smith, “Get Your Anti-Femininity out of my Feminism”

Yes, it's the second of the month, and...

My eyes have tears in them. 'My eyes,' I think, 'Is it hormones?'

I remember terrible fights with my father as a teenager. Him telling me to get on the pill already and that women become irrational on their periods. As if that were a bad thing. I hope he didn't mean to say those things, but what I took from those sayings was that being a woman meant being less than a man and being mental. It was something you had to carry around with you like a chip on your shoulder and fix at any given opportunity.

I've realized that men put so much effort into telling women what to do with their bodies and to "even out those hormones."

But you can't grow if you're too worried about having feelings at all.

My body is giving birth to me right now. I'm leaving the "I'm so awkward, no one loves me, and I'm cheap" feeling, to grow into more beautiful thoughts.

I'm experiencing an altered state, but the end result will be that I will have experienced all the negative thoughts and emotions I've had my entire life only to understand that they're so untrue and have no power over me.

I'll be done with the negativity.

Then I'll be ready to become multiple. This time is for shedding weakness.